Stories about Barbara
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Dale: Letter to my sister, Barbara, my "second Mom" a week before she passed:
You’ve always been my beautiful big sister who has always shown deep and unwavering care for me all of my life. In fact, you've been like a second Mother! Always the most responsible sibling, you took care of me when I was a baby, a teenager (yikes!) and beyond!
Do you remember taking Rob, 6, on the train all by yourself from WA to Florida, when you were just 14! I can't imagine, for he was a real rascal, or so I was told.
You always have had the best taste, with awesome gifts at Christmas and birthdays. I'm embarrassed to say that I didn't always take care of them, though.
For example, do you remember when you gave Lesley and Liz fine new outfits when we were at a family reunion in Montreat? I let them wear them to the sapphire mine in which we washed the clay dirt in the water troughs? Ugh, their clothes were so filthy with red clay stains! You didn't fuss, though, but just worked and worked to remove the stains.
You bought my first girdle and hose for my 16th birthday. Of course, I was thoroughly embarrassed when I had to open and display those at the dinner table! Back then, I was so shy that I wouldn't even go in front of Dad with my hair rolled up.
What a great birthday scavenger hunt you orchestrated for another birthday, with clues put in freezer containers all over the fields on the farm. I'm sure my friends never forgot that fun day!
You received the Emily Post award at Gaffney High School, for always knowing the correct etiquette. Maybe that's why my English teacher said: "You're really not like your sister Barbara, are you?" Ha!!! I think that also was the day she noticed the paint in my hair---no, it wasn't on purpose like is common these days.
Boy, you really had a tough job, taking care of our Dad those years after Mom died, doing the taxes using receipts thrown into a dresser drawer! Then you had to get him to the hospital and deal with his idiosyncrasies, all while you had a family at home.
We did have fantastic family reunions for 10 years, didn't we? I think you planned 3 of them in Charleston. Those were so much fun, catching crabs with chicken necks, then helping Can cook them. She stabbed them in the middle, then tossed them with oil and spices. Remember? We did crafts, painted onesies for baby Rebecca, played with bubbles with homemade soap solution and huge coat hanger wands. Of course, we toured forts, swamps and boats, also plantations.
I think Estes Park, Colorado and Port Angeles, WA were two of your favorites. We hiked, drove above the timberline and took nature tours in CO, picked cherries in WA, with you and Ann making jam, then later toured Butchart Gardens in Victoria, BC. Fun times…
The trip to the Outer Banks with Ann and Peggy was one I'll always cherish. Of course, our church's England trip with you, Lee and Ann was wonderful, especially the week with just the four of us: Stratford-Upon-Avon, Bath, Stonehenge, politically incorrect GollyWog Dolls for Ann, James Herriott's veterinary practice in Thirsk, the Howard Castle, and not-to-forget delicious breakfasts of beans, grilled tomatoes and eggs. You are such a special sister. I would like to thank you for all of your kindness and love throughout the years.
Now I wish your days to be peaceful and comfortable.
With all my love,
Dale
Barbara’s Initiative to Get Home
Barbara was happy when in October 1939, the family moved to Port Townsend WA, where her father had been assigned as the Commandant of the Coast Guard Recruit Training Center there.
They lived on the base in the Commandant’s Quarters, and frequently got to see recruits learning how to march. In October 1941, her little brother, Robert Ruff (called Rob) was born. Shortly after that, in December the Japanese attacked Pearl Harbor and we were at war with Japan. The West Coast started having air raid drills in 1942. When the first air raid alert happened in Port Townsend, Barbara was in the third grade. Not waiting for the school bus that was supposed to take the students home, Barbara took off running for home, 2-1/2 miles away. After it was discovered that she was not available to get on the school bus, her parents were called, and a search started from their home and the school.
After about a half hour she was found, running through the town toward home.
Dale's interview with Barbara in 2013 about life in Port Townsend WA after Pearl Harbor when the U.S. joined WWII:
"We lived in Port Townsend WA beginning in 1941. The schools were good, but I was worried about riding the bus shuttle. I hid in the bushes once to avoid riding the shuttle to school. Mother rolled bandages at the hospital for the war effort. I was in charge of Rob, a baby. Our windows were blacked out. I didn't know how to warm the bottle with no electricity, but our mother fussed at me for turning on a light. Our conditions weren't anything compared to those in England. Gardens were wonderful. We took trips, like apple or cherry orchards. I would ride on the shelf in the back of the car, a black 1940 Plymouth."
Note: It's interesting that Barbara was in charge of Rob, the baby, because Ann was two years older, and quite capable. Barbara once said though, that she always felt responsible for everyone else.
Barbara’s Summer of Trouble
After WWII was over the family moved to a 2-bedroom house in Waylyn Community, in what is now North Charleston, SC. Her father bought a small camping trailer, parked it in the back yard, and Barbara and her older sister, Ann, used that as their bedroom. Her mother became pregnant in late 1946.
By May 1947, a decision was made that to make things easier on her mother. Barbara, 13, would take her brother Rob, 5, to visit their Grandmother Ruff in Saint Petersburg, FL for the summer. The baby was due in early July. One day in early June Barbara and Rob departed Charleston on the train for the overnight trip, seated in coach, to Saint Petersburg. Rob, being a rambunctious five-year old boy, loved to move up and down the length of the train. That was OK with Barbara because she knew that her brother was smart enough to not get off the train. However, in the middle of the night Barbara was awaken by the conductor coming through the train saying, “Train splits in Jacksonville. First eight cars go to Tampa. Last eight cars go to Las Angeles.” Rob was not in the seat beside her! As the train began to slow for the stop in Jacksonville, she began looking for him, searching every car. When the train stopped, she began to really worry, and then panic when the train lurched as if it was uncoupled. Having checked all the front cars, she now raced toward the back of the train. As she entered the last car, she spotted Rob walking toward her with a railroad crewman. The crewman told her that when he had connected the switching locomotive to the last car, he had seen a young boy watching the operation from the little open platform on the last car in a train. When he asked the boy where he was going and the boy answered Saint Petersburg, he knew the boy was on the wrong part of the train. He told Barbara that he would give them about five minutes to get to the front half of the train before he disconnected it. Barbara said she and Rob ran all the way to their seats, and a few minutes later felt the train lurch again as it was split apart.
While that was the worst situation, Barbara always said that summer was tough, trying to keep her five-year-old brother out of trouble.